Monday, April 17, 2006

Guten Tag

Arrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhh! I have been tagged by this vial of venom
Here goes anyway.....

1.Grab the book nearest to you, turn on page 18 and find line 4.

.... Afghans. Jayapal's army is estimated at 12000 cavalry, 30000 foot...

2. Stretch your left arm as far as you can

The girl sitting in the PC station next to mine slaps me..... Ayyo!
M'scuse, Cherie!

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?

That Ashiqui Meri video from 36 Chinatown.

4.Without looking, guess what time it is?

2:40 PM?

5. Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?

2: 36 PM.

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

The above mentioned girl putting a supari on my head through her mobile phone.

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

Cursing the cablewallahs for not fixing my net connection and dashing off to the cafe.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?

My orkut scrapbook.

9. What are you wearing?

Prem Nazir era Psychedelic pattern dark lungi and cotton shirt.

10. Did you dream last night?


11. When did you last laugh?

Outlook's year end special issue with a cartoon on our own Fraud-i-Jahan-i-Maulvi-ul-Management, "Doctor" Arindam Chaudhari. It was hilarious..... showed the Ponytail with the seat of his pants bitten off by a webpage (Refers to the major asskicking he got from desi blogosphere from gurus like Greatbong and Gaurav Sabnis. Too bad I missed it!). Exclusive expose of his pink floral undies too.....

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?

The cafe walls? Lots of ads...... lots. Some interior decoator they got!

13. Seen anything weird lately?

Yea....... Comrade V.S. Achuthanandanov is going by the moniker "Vikas purush".
Yea right.... and I am Bolshoi Ballerina Anna Pavlova!

14. What do you think of this quiz?

Needs more of ze Weird Factor.

15. What is the last film you saw?

Der Untergang (Downfall)
PS: I could write poems on this piece of art....... great movie!
Bruno Ganz is amazing! I never thought I would feel even a sliver of sympathy for Hitler.

16. If you became a multimillionaire overnight, what would you buy?

A 6000 sq ft seaside villa in Malibu county.... on a 5 acre walled grounds.
A castle in Ireland.
A Gulfstream Jet.
A 1000 acre farmhouse near Delhi.
Kawdiar Palace, Trivandrum. (They BETTER sell it when I ask them!)

17. Tell me something about you that I dunno.

I am claustrophobic.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

Teleport our friendly neighbours viz Pakis, Chinese, BDs etc to a barely habitable planet
atleast 347,897,000 parsecs away and replace them with blondes from Sweden.

19. Do you like to dance?

Sunny Deol takes his dancing lessons from me. See him do my steps in Yaara O Yaara song in Jeet?

20. George Bush.

He's no village idiot. Don't fall for that old parlor trick.....
PS: You know guys, I am Republican!

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?


22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?


23. Would you ever consider living abroad?


24. What do you want GOD to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?

Welcome, my son! Your 72 Houris are waiting by the poolside.

25. 4 people who must also do this meme in their journal.

Sorry. Everyone else I know has done zis!


At 5:33 PM, Blogger Nikhil Narayanan said...

aliyo ormayundo???
KV Pangode X 1996, XII 1998..REC Warangal
last 2 meetings njan parayam
1)second last aftr master mind prelims in 2002, we walked together till vazhuthakkad..autoyil vellayambalam bus stop vare poyi
2)Career Launcher..njan CAT prep GRE ikku cheraan vannu, ammmayude koode....
before which Mohankumar sir inte class tuitions..
etho oru poenninte peru ninte shirtil potty or someone else ezhutharundu...
nee eppol evide aliya???

At 5:35 PM, Blogger quills said...

It's tag season eh and you got this one already! sigh!!!!

Gosh! It was really funny reading through your list. :))Good one!

Btw, no wonder the girl at the PC next to you attacked ....after all...what were you thinking dressed in lunkhi and cotton shirt, and acting all smart! :)

At 11:01 PM, Blogger venus said...

I'm waiting to see a CNN+BBC+NDTV special edition on teleprting Pakis, BDs and chinese to the the death star, and anand aka anakin skywalker blows the deathstar off for the better good of the rest of the universe :D

are u still alive to read this or the supari deal got executed successfully ??:P

I want to see ur gf or ur fair sex companion's action (er reaction) on yor wanting god to offer you 72 houries ;)

very hillarious.. ROFL :))

At 3:25 AM, Blogger Pooja said...

Huh? You do owe me an apology. < sniff>

At 9:03 AM, Blogger silverine said...

The girl sitting in the PC station next to mine slaps me and girl putting a supari on my head through her mobile phone ROFL

Point to note: Must sit near a hunk when I am doing this tag :p

Totally agree with you on all point here. The name Indira and Rajiv are quite cool actually. Glad you got blogging, cos there are so few humor bloggers around and I love reading such blogs :)

At 4:06 PM, Blogger Jiby said...

puppy's second son's name...rahul, third son's name...jawaharlal, forth son's name sanjay,...etc, etc, etc

puppy's second daughter's name...sonia, third...priyanka, forth...kamala...etc, etc, etc

choodaakalle aliya...njan varumbam ente notes tharane!!!! lol!!!!!!!!

At 7:25 PM, Blogger >|' ; '| said...

u have a brilliant mind darth compadre!
viva la teleportazione!

if them mafia wallaas come to skin ya, just tell that u r ashok kas dosth..avanmaar odum ;)

looking at ur kids names, i think that u better change ur darth codename to darth anand k gandhi :D

danke for taking the quiz! >:D<

At 4:53 AM, Blogger Maya Cassis said...

thought you wanted to be tagged and hence invented your own which is doing alot of famous rounds around blog world hehe ...
You ARE SO FUNNY!!!!!!
hee hee hee

At 11:38 AM, Blogger Alexis Leon said...

Nice one. Hilarious.

The above mentioned girl putting a supari on my head through her mobile phone ROFL

At 8:54 AM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Nikhil: Long time no see, boss! This is a real blast from the past..... Whats up? Mail me at thest0ryteller at yahoo dot com. I kannot divulge perzonal inphormationz in zis place, Herr Nikhil. I haf already bean Kompremized. Zey are watching my everee move.....

@ Quills: Nandri! Bahut nandri, Quillsamma!
Can't blame her though! I turned a few heads when I waltzed into that netcafe full of wannabe homies, yuppies and wannabe yuppies.... wearing authentic Mallu Kallu Shaappu (local toddy bar) attire! All that was missing was an off-white towel-turban and striped Lorrywallah patent knickers doing peek-a-boo under my folded Lungis. Oh, did I mention I took my sleek new Reebok bag with me?
Some combination, eh? But I needed to get online ASAP!

@ Venus: Torpedo Bays, Ion Cannons, Air Rifles, grappling hooks and pillows ready, Grand Admiral Venus. Awaiting your command to commence attack on the Imperial Armada, Milady.
Long live The Galactic Republic! :P

Ohhhh, that Supari entrusted to some Dongri Chapter of the D Company? Those Mumbaiyya pissants with peashooter pistols playing gangstas? Pooh..... I am on scarier lists! >:D

And the reactions from my harems? They are entitled to just token protests and petitions...... Inconsequential. :P

@ Pooja: Uncle Anand is so so sorry! Honest onlee! Wokay? Now..... DO THE FR1GGIN TAG!!!! :P

@ Silverine: Errrrr.... what do we have here? Silvie McBeal?! :P
Tch tch tch. But don't worry my child, *you* have Swami Biryananda's blessings! (Sprinkling holy water from my Kamandu)May you find loads better luck than that wee li'l pardesi Vakil. SatPutrati Bhava! ;)

The names of my juniors thingie; It does depends on the political/ethnic/religious denomination my bitter.... oops, better half, right? For all I know, I might have to go for Hirohito or Harbaksh or Hydrose or Eldho! But Lord.... keep me safe as I tread this path beset on all sides by the tyranny of evil, outlander enchantresses! Swaha, Amen and Inshallah!

@ Jiby: (Unspeakable expletives deleted)

@ Poison: I thank you in the name of all the Sith lords who have ever graced this galaxy, Oh Darth Venomous.

PS: Darth Gandhi has already been taken by an animal rights enviornazi who was born Maneka Anand (No relation to me)..... One who fell to the dark side after her husband's death and now rides with Trident Federation. ;)

@ Maya: Ahhhh.... The Word is being disseminated? Good work, my First Acolytes! You have been assured upscale locales... and reserved parking slots in paradise.

@ Alexis: Thanx Alexis :)

At 4:16 PM, Blogger Maya Cassis said...

hee hee hee couldn't stop giggling..parking slots in paradise he he

At 7:52 PM, Blogger Mind Curry said...

lol..that was too funny..and your idea of multi is mine multiplied a few times considering all that you planning to buy..guess it wont be too long.

At 2:21 AM, Blogger quills said...


....wearing authentic Mallu Kallu Shaappu (local toddy bar) attire! All that was missing was an off-white towel-turban and striped Lorrywallah patent knickers doing peek-a-boo under my folded Lungis. ...
you are funnnyyyyyyy...:)) I can't stop laughing, after reading your responses to this one and your comments to silverine's latest post, so much so that I could not even leave a comment on her blog.

You and silverine together are increasing the 'laughter quotient ' of people. :)

At 12:59 PM, Blogger Nikhil Narayanan said...

Mailing u..nee ithra buzzee aavum and clebrity aavum ennu vicharichilla..dey,nee ipaam entharanu paripady??
oh!evide parayan pattoollalla...mail ayakk kettaaa..:))

Ciao dude

At 1:15 PM, Blogger Nikhil Narayanan said...

ninte veroru mail id tha..I got a mailer deamon from what u gave


At 9:19 PM, Blogger venus said...

oooh so they outsourced supari to mumbai D comp!! U've been given some more time by god's grace dude, wear as much as lungi as u want, and then wait for the 72 houries ;)

At 11:27 PM, Blogger calvin said...

Hey you know someone called "puppy" ;)

At 11:11 PM, Blogger Jithu said...

1000 acre farm house near Delhi?? entire Delhi wud b less than that :p

At 7:58 AM, Blogger Anand K said...

Sorry for the delay folks, but the exams are almost upon me and I get online rarely (as opposed to every hour). But today I have an itching impulse to blog......

@ Nihil: You got Orkutted.

@ Venus: More time? Like (atleast) 60 yrs more? Danks! :P

PS: I always wondered, does one go to heaven in his youthful glory or as he was when he kicked the bucket? In that case 72 Houris ain't gonna be *very* useful when I go as an nonagenerian.

@ Aashik: Arrrrrrrrrggggggghhhh...... my past comes back to haunt me! :P

@ Jithu: Well, they do have some beyond city limits! It seems Amar Singh owns a couple of these... time to fleece that slimy slob. 8)

At 3:48 PM, Blogger calvin said...

I am no loyolite , but Jiby is :D

At 8:54 PM, Blogger quills said...

Anand ji, enthu exams aanu ezhuthunnathu? :)Good luck!

At 12:29 AM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Quills: Civil Services Exam 2006 :)
And so is Jiby...

At 4:43 AM, Blogger quills said...

Wow! I knew it! :)Well, I won't disturb. But all the very best. My prayers and wishes. Do us bloggers and Kerala proud. :)

Btw, after your exams, when you get time, pls check out the latest tag on my blog. :)

At 11:37 AM, Blogger calvin said...

HEY !! All the best for the exams

At 5:47 PM, Blogger Pinkbury said...

Quite funny!!

At 5:28 PM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Quills: Thanx! Crossing my fingers here.........

@ Aashik: Thanx Aashik. :)

@ Pink Berry: ;)

At 6:33 AM, Blogger Pooja said...


At 12:00 AM, Blogger mathew said...

Hi Anand..

this is a general mail which am sendin to few postin it as comment coz i dint get ur mail ID..please delete the comment after u read it..

I believe you are a regular reader of Silverine's blog and
..I was wondering if I could manage to collect birthday greetings (which falls on July 6th) for her from all her regular readers ...and post it in the blog...

It would be great if you could send me scanned copy of a handwritten message or a mail message itself so that I can consolidate all of em..

It would be nice if the messages are not restricted to one liners and are funny in typical silverish way!!! ;-P

Hopin for a response from all of you...Please let fellow regular Poomanam or Think pad readers aware of it..

Dont forget to include your blog URL's and names in the message..



At 8:08 PM, Blogger 日月神教-任我行 said...



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