Saturday, April 08, 2006

The Wanderer Tags.....


Nobody has tagged me yet....... bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah and boo-fr1ggin-hoo. Therefore, I decided to start a chain myself. This potpourri is somewhat weird, snoopy and spooky I guess..... consider this as a punishment for not tagging me yet! NJAHAHAHAHAHA.

I have chosen da following Lords of Blogistan Khanates in this initiative. The are, Jiby, MindCurry, Silverine, Quills, Deepa, Poison, and Pooja .
Kripya indulge moi and yourself. Spread my message, ye lesser mortals.

PS: You may choose to invoke the 5th Amendment (US) principle. ;)

And now, let me give MY take......


5 people who top your sh1t list..... and why:

a) Velupillai Prabhakaran: Reason, the assassination of Rajiv Gandhi.

b) Mallika Sherawat: For being a blot on the fair name of the vamp. Vamps have class!

c) Arundhati Roy: For being a bloviating banshee and an obfusticating, pseudo-secular, pseudo-socialist fraud.

d) Brinda Karat and Prakash Karat: A very dangerous and high-profile duo.....

e) Hafeez Mohammed Sayeed: Don't you just love these kind of critters?

Close brushes with death/danger:

a) I-15 highway, Spring Break 2005: Trip to Vegas and Grand Canyon. GC swung the Ford sharply into the bushes to avoid being fodder for that eighteen-wheel truck...... Some drunk bums who were tailing us tried to "coax" us to play Chicken in that godforsaken stretch. I swear I had an epiphany of a tall, mace-armed dark figure on a water-buffalo beckoning me...

b) Trivandrum, 1997: Hitched a ride with S, after tution classes. He sees his longtime crush coming out of a bakery and instantly forgets he's on a bike, in the busiest junction in Trivandrum..... with a valuable person like me riding pillion. He didn't change gears, he didn't slow down, no signals..... just swung into the wrong side and almost into the pavement to say Hi to her. I still dunno how we escaped that KSRTC bus........ I could almost smell the drivers chappals.

5 Preferable modes of suicide, in descending order:

You never know. In case you ever need to.....ummmmm, heh heh. Nothing.
Anyway, I remember this discussion I had with a cpl of classmates in CET. I never knew those dudes and dudettes were so warped. Cool!

a) Slitting yer veins in a hot tub:
Fave method of disgraced Roman Patricians. Painless, dreamlike and clean.... as long as you don't slice the wrist tendons instead. Gives you *some* time to reconsider what you are doing. In case you can't afford a tub, a bucket of water wud do

b) Sleeping Pills:
At least 40 barbituaries it seems.... not yet expired, pleej. Not unless you wanna die of Diarrhea instead! Use it only if someone can find you before you start to stink.

c) Gunshot:
It is said that the classic filmi shot to the temple is not very reliable as the bullet might travel on the inside edge of the thick cranium.... and leave you a vegetable. Try shooting inside your mouth, barrel directed to the spine. Or from under your chin, barrel upwards.

d) The Jump: 100% guarentee if you take atleast the 15th floor..... but causes a bad mess. You either get splattered or land on your legs, driving them into your torso or something.

e) Hanging: The upside, you can do it almost anywhere...... with anything. The downside, brown pants..... always. Moreover, a very slow, messy and painful Tyburn Jig if your neck doesn't break when the chair is kicked off.

Wicked, eh? :P

5 Guilty pleasures:

a) Blaxploitation movies..... luvvvvv Pam Grier.

b) Midnight Masala of local TV channels. A salute to my schoolboy years..... somehow it looks cheesy now.

c) 80's era Rajnikanth films.... the ones where he grabs a rocket mid-flight and directs it back to the villain saying "Ithu Unakku"! (Tams, please don't pounce on me!)

d) Mithunda's B-movies...... all except Jallad, which was a kinda OK remake of Satyaraj's Amaithi Padai, a surprisingly good movie. Cool performances by both Mithunda and especially the Lollu Mannan, Satyaraj.

e) Bollywood "action" flicks from the early 90s. Anyone remember those flicks like Mr.Bond, Suraksha and Zaalim?

5 things you never want to forget:

a) Dad, Mom, Bro and I, 1993 .......... South India pilgrimage trip. We've had so many trips, but this one is my fave. Especially the Tanjavur leg of the trip.

b) When she gave me that hilarious "love-note" ....... even though it was in jest and I had to laugh with everyone.

c) Winning my first Quiz..... 1990, Bishop's Hall, Trivandrum.

d) Loyola years, letting those sweet, creamy "jam-cakes" melt in my mouth.........

e) The first view of my university from the freeway.

5 things you wish to forget:

a) Our Pettai Rap in the school assembly...... at the farewell to our seniors function. Fr Manimala was too shocked and numbed to launch the verbal firestorm he's notorious for.

b) Trying to mix Tequila, bare bones Vodka, Gin and Pizza in ONE sitting..... and "redecorating" Bala's room and a couple of his friends. I was later told they had to call the Federal Emergency Management Agency to decontaminate the county. It was my first time you see.... and I never drank again after that. (I mean, nothing stronger than champagne).

c) That major traffic jam I caused in Pattom when I inexplicably forgot all my driving lessons in a flash...... The upside, learned a lot of imaginative Gaalis from the friendly traffic cop who came to aid me.

d) That goddamned cop costume they made we wear for GG House tableau for the Youth Festival...... gave me the worst case of rashes! I strongly suspect it was last used by some Kurd lab-rat in one of Saddam Hussein's bio-war labs.

e) OJ convincing me to sing Hotel California (Mallu-Mix Unlimited version) along with him in Deer Park venue of Sarang 2001. Think Lolakutty/Sister Stella/Ludakrishna-MC Vikram accents....... Gawd, I still remember this minx tying her duppatta to a low branch, making a noose at the other end and doing a mock suicide right in front of our "perfomance".

"Whalekome to dhee Hwottelll Kaaaaaliphorniyaaa,
Suchhyya Lowwwleeeee Playzzz...."

5 really exotic dishes you have tried:

a) Thousand Year Egg
b) Ox Lengua
c) Kimjang Kimchi
d) Murg Musallam
e) Chapli Kebab

5 crushes/loves in your life... in chronological order (even initials or nicknames wud do. Oh, no ID attempts or requests pleez):

a) Enya
b) Urmila Matondkar
c) SC
d) LS
e) Udita Goswami (Pre-skank version....... Saw her in that nun's habit in Paap? Sighhh!)

Strangest dream you ever had:

One dream a long time ago;
I'm in a rather rickety bus which is making a night trip...... can't see nothing outside, no lights, no stars, no vehicles and the road seems like an endless stretch. There seems to be no driver and there's just another passenger besides me. This passenger is a dementor like figure, only a pair of almost death-white forearms can be seen and it is sitting next to me. The voice is however rather soothing...... I think it was a female voice and quite impishly inquisitive. It was making me talk endlessly about Gulmohars, Lucky Ali songs, the apocrypha, Celtic mythos, wanderlust, ...... plus a host of other topics. Endless is the word!

The thing that makes this dream quite creepy is, I forget ALL my dreams as soon as I wake up.... but in this case I remember almost every single word exchanged, the motion of the hands, the way the spectre connected these assorted topics seamlessly..... right down to the bus stopping beside by my bed lying by the highway and it telling me "Now this is where we part.... for now". Seemed soooooo real!

Out of body experience? Acid trip? I need professional help?
Whaddya think?

5 most valued personal possessions:

My awards and certificates
Those hundreds of photos...
My diaries and logs..... and assorted mementos. Been backing up the older logs and diaries into my computer since '98.
My Laptop and External Hard Disk
My movie collection

5 favorite superheroes..... and why:

a) The Punisher: No superpowers, just demonic rage and hate. Darkest of the lot.
b) V: The true revolutionary. The one who knows "Why" and "How".
c) Spiderman: The Everyman Superhero.
d) Rorschach: Moral absolutism, his conviction, attitude..... and tragic fate.
e) Batman: The tech, the measured steps to combat crime, Christian Bale's and Michael Keaton's portrayals.

Uh Oh.
In hindsight....... shouldn't have made this crazy post. :P



At 9:19 AM, Blogger quills said...

aha! So this is what you have been upto...foisting tough tags on unsuspecting bloggers.:)) Anyways, I am honoured and in the next few days or weeks will try and attempt answers to your chosen topics as truthfully as possible, although some of them worries me a bit.

Do you get these ideas from the umpteen dark movies you watch, O Anand Ebert of blogosphere? ;)

At 2:15 PM, Blogger Jiby said...

aliya, one crush listile SC pazhaya SPHybridization thanneyaano... in that case i need to forward this link to her.

neways the way u snore i never knew u could dream such profound things!!!!

i still cant forget the Pettah Rap!!!! cant believe the amazing amount of guts and tholikatti we had in store all those years!!! thinking of mani's surprised face makes me roll on the sure we were the jolliest set of rebels loyola ever knew!

i cud comment on every line u wrote here and remind u of some more "cool stuff" abt u that u conveniently forgot!

with this jambavan desktop and dialup connection...i am going blogging for me until the exams get over again...will take up this tag soon man...see u when u get home!

eda ninne kaliyakki kaliyakki ente avasthayum house arrest pole aayi...choodathe engottum erangaan thonnunnilla!!!

quills, dunno abt u...but most of the movies Anand Ebert of blogosphere watches have caused many of our friends to pull their hairs out in despair...well, he says we are all cynics and intellectually stunted!!!

At 6:17 PM, Blogger silverine said...

aargh do I have to do this? why ? why? why? :(

@jiby: Waiting with bated breath for the expose on our mad scientist :p

At 11:42 PM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Quills:: BUHUHUHHAHAHAHAHAHA. Friendship, nee.... even mere acquaintance with the Wanderer comes with a heavy price, Ma'am Quills. ;)
BTW, you need weeks for this psychometric test?! Tch Tch Tch.
And some questions worry you? They should! >:D

The source of my dark ideas? Well, I am reliably told that I was BORN warped.... movies had nuthin much to do with it. As the George Thoroughgood song ( written and composed in my honor, naturally) goes,

"Ye know the day I was born... the nurses all gathered round,
They gazed at wide wonder at the joy they had found,
The Head Nurse spoke up, "So leave this one alone",
She could say by the way, that I was bad to the bone....."


@ Jiby: No No No. I was talking about Sadao Chimura, the Japanese exchange student in our school. You remember.... that cute guy who used to be a girl once. The one you once dedicated that beautiful love-ode, "The Fairy King", in Youth Festival '96. :P
Why... why.... why are you making me exhume the dead past?! The curse of the Sith be upon you, vile knave!

Cool stuff about me? Oho, blackmail! You are sooooo dead! And given the your "aesthetic sense" and taste in movies, I will only be doing humanity a great favor!

@ Silverine: Thou hast breaken moi corazon, Fraulein! Sigh, Snifffffff!
And I so wished I could get into Silverine's head with the subliminal headshrink that's embedded into my tag questionnaire. :P

At 7:12 AM, Blogger RajpaL said...

Have to agree - a crazy post! Would be 'Normal' if you leave the suicide part out :P

At 8:08 AM, Blogger venus said...

very descriptive and detailed revealation of li'lbit you! Thank you for sharing with us..
why this suicide 5s here though??

At 10:38 PM, Blogger quills said...

aha....don't think you have escaped from being tagged yourself. Now that you are rubbing your hands in glee and waiting for us poor bloggers to bare our hearts, I have decided that you need to do one as well that is not of your own making . :)

So why don't you get your pen and paper ready...

Rules of the game are:
1. The tagged victim has to come up with 8 different points of their perfect lover.
2. Need to mention the sex of the target.
3. Tag 8 victims to join this game & leave a comment on their comments saying they’ve been tagged
.4. If tagged the 2nd time, there’s no need to post again.


At 10:39 PM, Blogger quills said...

@jiby: yeah I can totally understand. :) But now I am on a mission to unearth the extent of the wanderer's movie mania. :))

At 8:52 AM, Blogger Jofu said...

that was freaky....
i wud have prefered reasons rather modes!!!!

At 11:18 AM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Rajpal: Heh Heh Heh, that was the joker in the pack!

@ Venus: Insight into me? Darn! I have delivered myself into the camps of the enemy. :P

@ Jofu: Aiyyo.... never wanted to kill myself! Except when I see Baba Seghal going "Pinga Pinga" or "Tora Tora" or any of his crap-pop on TV. The horror...... the horror!

At 11:54 AM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Quills: Your counter-offensive had caught me off-guard GeneralFeldsmarshall Quillz, but here's the terrible response of the Qa-Khan! MUHUHUHAHAHAHAHA...

Idea of mah perfect love:
Life-form: Hominid of the species Homo sapiens
Sex: Female (since birth!)

1. Drop dead gorgeous. No compromise. Nyet! No! Nein! Nahin!

2. Desi (PS: Konnichiewa! Japanese can also apply. Arrigato!)

3. Proficient in the 3 Pitikas, 4 Vedas, 6 Shastras, 7 Fists and 18 forms of Kalaripayettu combat.

4. Very very very very forgiving!

5. (0-6) mph in 3.2 seconds

6. Gourmet Cook. Mughalai, Mallu (Travancore), Andhra, Middle East, Mediterranean, Continental and American cuisine.

7. Engineer or Historian or Sociologist or Anthropologist or Spy or Assassin or Professional Interrogator or Con Artist or Union Minister. Couples gotta talk, right.... and the above fields fascinate me. I dunno if I can really bond with a chick out of fashion school..... I'll probaly lose interest in her soon, shoot her and make a dress out of her skin like my Guru Shri Shri Jame Gumb taught me. :P

8. Voice of an Angel. Yes pleej!

BTW, this tag has been already taken by *every* blogger I know (n00bie here!). By Rule 4, I don't need to tag them, right? :)

At 9:41 AM, Blogger ~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

heeee heeee ....

i rem the Hotel California bit in Saraang ... was too stunned to react ...

damn... that was a great trip .. but rem .. i got my ligament tear thanx to Gokul.. PAi .....

Still cant forgive him that !

the tag sounds pretty morbid -- the suicide and all ...
can i skip all that while doing the tag ?

At 9:42 AM, Blogger ~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...


At 9:48 AM, Blogger ~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

btw , abt me being scared of the loyolites , well , i was so small then .... and i was seeing the std 12 specimens grinning wickedly ...

Note : Was so small then .. hadnt seen wicked grins except on tv

At 9:40 PM, Blogger Pooja said...

I innocently decide to see if the loyola bugger is saying anything about hac and here I find a li'l game and I am a part of it ;)

Sounds like fun, I will put up a blog entry answering these. Some of them are tricky, will see how I can be diplomatic and still answer the question :P

At 10:25 AM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Deepa: Aiyyo....... forgot that you were an eyewitness to that incident! (PS: you tore aligament that day?! I thought it was just a sprain..... )

BTW, you want to skip that caantroverssial question in the tag? Et tu Deepus?
Sighhh, OK. But Iam very very disappointed in thee! :P

@ Pooja: Welcome to the tag Games, P. You will be getting more of these..... a lot of nutjobs like me in blogosphere with lotsa time in their hands throwing tags left and right!

At 10:47 PM, Blogger >|' ; '| said...

do what u wana do
be what u wana be

well i lifted that dialog from geos blog. heh. seems like i am intellectually too drained to make a comment of any sort. did the tag ;) long time ago. seems u have seen it. that says a lot about me. man of action. :P

i wish!

At 12:49 AM, Blogger silverine said...

Ze tag is done O Great One!!!


At 5:34 PM, Blogger >|' ; '| said...

Tremble mortal!
For vengeance is mine >:) !!!

u ve been Tagged!

At 11:52 PM, Blogger Mind Curry said...

you know, i was smiling away to glory reading silverine's post after getting tagged and seeing her list i came here and my jaw dropped.

man, what time of the day do you work to get these ideas? amazing. i think i did ask you this before, but do you work for HBO or Star Movies??


you are one helluva guy, commander!

At 9:39 PM, Blogger Pooja said...,guid,073ff0ca-e0c3-4a50-86c0-604d046c92c2.aspx
This wasn't exactly fun!

At 4:49 PM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Silevrine: Nice Silverine!

@ Poison: I obey, maaaawster!

@ MindCurry: What time I get those ideas? Ever heard of "Sardarji Baarah Baj gaye" time? ;)

@ Pooja: Aiyyo..... it wasn't fun? But I guess that's the whole idea behind tags. :P
PS: Just wait till you get my next tag!

At 5:18 PM, Blogger Pinkbury said...

unusual take on the subject....funny & entertaining....
Thanks for making my day!!!!

At 5:50 PM, Blogger Dhanush said...

Allayo - Mad Scientist, Principal Scientific Advisor to Kim Il Jong, CEO of Cyberdene Corporation, formerly Earth's representative at Starfleet HQ and The Emperor's Court in Coruscant

Your tag has reached my chall-dhanno through the great blog warrors Silverine->Alexis->Abhilash.

I was wondering who created this, and Alexis told me that it was you.
Good one Man. Really Made me to think , think , think and think and come up with a lot of pages from my life. Hope you will like it.

At 12:04 PM, Blogger Anand K said...

@ Pink Berry: Thanx boss.... I always wanted to make a tag. The original one I devised but never released was "weirder" and creepier.... retained just the suicide question from that tag. Mebbe I should post it soon....
Glad you liked this though... :)

@ Dhanush: Hi Dhanush! Thanx for the ompliment....
I must say Chall Dhanno is a cool name! I still remember the chase scene and Hema Malini going Chall Dhanno! Aaj he Basanti ki izzat ka sawaal." As a kid who watched it for the firt time,I remember praying that Dhanno survived the fall ;)

I checked out ur blog b4 writing this.... you got a really good page there!

At 11:07 AM, Blogger Dhanush said...


Dhanno was my short name among my training batchmates in Pune and Mumbai. Thanks to Rahul and Sachin, my roommates. They made it more popular so that who ever joined or came to our room started addressing me "Oh Dhanno". Later I too started liking it.

Thanks for Visiting

At 8:09 PM, Blogger 日月神教-任我行 said...



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